Friday, December 09, 2005
Corona secured, plus cigarettes. realized the snow is up to my knees so it is more than 8 inches. now the sun is out.
slid around quite a bit even though i didn't have far to go. the plows in this town don't do a very good job. every intersection was mush.
still thinking about my sister.
our plow guy hasn't come yet. i'll be glad when i have a nicely plowed driveway. i'm parked on the street and afraid someone is going to slide into me.
ducklady walks even funnier in the snow.
got my check from the credit card company. now i can pay some bills.
it doesn't seem like close to christmas. i have most of my gifts bought. i have a christmas card that i haven't opened in three days. just don't want it to come, i guess. i'll be alone.
marsha called yesterday but i was out with sean and didn't hear the phone. she asked me to call her when i got a minute. she doesn't seem willing to come out here one day a week. i didn't call her back. if all we're going to have from now on is phone contact, i don't like it much. oh man, the cat just farted. three in the room, don't know who to blame it on.
though it is easier for me to talk on the phone than face to face. i'd still rather see marsha once a week than not at all. she just doesn't like going out of town. but she said she would still be my case manager when i moved out here. and that means visits. i don't know. i don't know what to think.
i'm still really depressed. i can't help but think that if my sister reconciles with her boyfriend, that would give me license to do myself in. i'm so tired of being nothing. being a loser. not much future to look forward to. okay, now i'm depressing myself more, if that's possible.
i'm going to shut up now.
Posted by Lisa ::
3:01 PM ::
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